There’s no faster way to become valued at work than handling conflict effectively. Conflict strikes fear in most people. Heroes deal with it. Administrators avoid it.
Now, that does not mean one needs to love conflict. No doubt, it wears people down. It’s hard to love what does that. Yet, exertion of any kind does that. So, if one does not want to feel worn down, don’t exert, don’t work.
Handling conflict effectively boils down to two things: mindset and skills. Having the right mindset means seeing the benefits of conflict. Having the right skills means learning the right tips and strategies. Together they give confidence and courage to do what many can’t.
The Tips And Strategies Of Handling Conflict Effectively
Tips and strategies differ in timeframe. Tips deal with the moment. Strategies deal with the before and after. The moment calls for tips that encourage venting. That means no judging.
The before and after call for strategies that promote engagement and relationships. The easiest and quickest way to make conflict worse is to avoid it. Engage. Don’t avoid.
Yes, after an intense exchange quiet works well. This allows reflection. A day works well, maybe two. Anything longer brings decay. Bad thoughts and feelings will dominate. Resentment grows.
Of course, all this works best if a good relationship exists. This means respect for the person, the emotions and the challenge behind the conflict. It does not mean pooh-poohing or trivializing either. Engagement shows respect. Avoidance disrespect.
The Mindset Of Handling Conflict Effectively
A baby comes into this world with conflict. Just ask any mother who gave birth naturally. A seedling busts through an acorn, again conflict. Muscles don’t become stronger without their fibers tearing from exertion, conflict.
Conflict means people care. No conflict exists with the dispassionate. A flat lined heart shows no conflict. A regular heartbeat disrupts that flat line, again conflict. Nothing becomes stronger or more vital without it.
In addition to seeing the positive that conflict can bring, the mindset of handling conflict is one of focus. Handling the conflict by using sound tips and strategies is that focus. Focus on others too, their emotions, challenges and insecurities, deflects focus on our own. In a way, the mindset is an out-of-body experience.
Conflict and Courage
One does not need to like conflict to handle it effectively. One only needs to not let the intensity overwhelm. In the end, it takes courage to handle conflict. Cowards avoid it. That’s why conflict costs companies so much. They hire too many cowards.